The smallest moments that turn into the biggest lessons…

I realized - I was wrong! We were all 4 in the car. It was dusk and we had just finished dinner. Both boys were in the backseat and my husband, Nick, was driving. You might know someone (or be someone) like these two…my 9-year-old has an internal personality and my 8-year-old has an external personality.

We were driving and my 9-year-old had brought math problems to work on (for FUN) in the car. He excitedly claimed, "Dad! I know how to do long division on paper!" I know - he's super cool😉

My 8-year-old didn't want to feel left behind, so he jumped in as well and said, "I know how to do long division on paper AND in my head."

Since I'm such a great mom, I decided to prove this little 8-year-old wrong! I kindly said, "Nice work! What's 10 divided by 2?"

That little 8-year-old thought and he pondered and worked on the problem in his head until his 9-year-old brother blurted out "5!" And then…the arguing and tears came.

My husband and I jumped in and gave a short math lesson. Then we talked about lying and how telling the truth was the most important thing. Honesty is key!

And like a ton of bricks - it hit me. This sweet 8-year-old was actually telling me a goal of his. He was telling me how he wanted to see himself, yet I was telling him he was wrong. Which was stopping his progress and his faith in himself. I was putting him inside of a mental cage that would be tough to break out of. I needed to encourage him on how to take the goals he has and make them real. Encourage him, not stop him.

You see, when we are little we are told to tell the truth. Always tell the truth and nothing but the truth. Then, to move forward in life, we are told to give little lies that we then have to fight against our entire lives to move forward with. It's called The Idea of Affirmations. An Affirmation is a little white lie that you want to come true - like, "I'm great at singing." The Affirmation idea is that if you say it enough, it will take you to a point where you truthfully are good at singing. The only problem is that since we were little, we are taught not to lie. We are taught to be truthful. So, when we say something that isn't 100% true in the moment, but we want it to be true, we will knock those affirmations back down. We put those concepts that we want to be true into a bucket of lies.



Let's pretend we have 2 buckets. One labeled Lie Bucket and the other labeled Truth Bucket. How do we take those things we want to be true out of the Lie Bucket and get them into the Truth Bucket? You ask the right questions! I call them Tapable Questions. It's like taping into a watering line for positivity and bringing the ideas to you as your truths.

Ask "Why" questions like:
Why am I able to do so much in such little time?
Why is the Universe trying to turn my life into a masterpiece?
Why am I always surrounded by love and laughter?
Why do I always have so much fun no matter what I'm doing?

Ask Tapable Questions and allow the best answers to flow to you. When you ask questions, you don't try to knock down the answers. You accept the answers that naturally flow to you.

How often do you look past yourself and never see the gifts that you bring to the table? Not the physical gifts, I mean the mental ones. I remember listening to a hostage negotiator that explained a few ways to tell if people are lying...Their mouth changes, speech patterns change and they look down. When we ask Tapable Questions we look up, we smile, and we search for truth. Is my child a liar? No, and I don't want him to stop believing in himself. When we have goals and we announce them, are we lying in that moment? No. When I doubt myself, it's because I'm not sold on my own abilities and I haven't announced them with true belief, confidence and conviction!

I make bad ass candles!

And, as a speaker, I change leaders' lives by teaching them how to create a healthy inner echo (self-relationships), which translates into healthy teams, families, marriages, employees and their lives and so on. The echo isn't only inside of you. The echo resonates from and outside of you! It pulses and travels and spreads like wildfire! Allow your echo to be heard!

Lead in knowing that where you are going is your truth! It's the game of asking the right "Tapable" Questions to advance to the next square on your game board. Once it's your truth, the entire game changes!

2021…Here we come!

Lots of love, XOXOXO!
-Georgia Vanderville