I spilled a candle all over my closet, my books and almost on a new dress I hadn't even worn yet. Why? Why did I have a wet drying candle in my closet?

I do a majority of our testing here at Shortie's Candle Company. I had been testing a new fragrance we were getting ready to launch (True Rose). It's awesome and I had to bring it home for "market research" 😉. I blew it out to eat dinner and cleared it off the table. I took it in the office, which also houses my closet. That closet houses everything else in the world.

I was going to set it on the desk to dry, but didn't want it to ruin anything or be in anyone's way. So I set it in the closet on this old shelf I salvaged a billion years ago.

I have been going through an interesting time of questioning why I do things, feel certain ways or process information how I do. I guess you could say, I'm turning over a new leaf.

I immediately realized how packed my closet was as I tried to find a place to set the candle down. The thought hit me..."I'm only worth 1 drawer in the closet." Another wave hit me…when I was little I always had to share a room, a closet, a dresser, a shelf. I never had anything of my own until I was 15.

When I first met my husband he was so sweet and asked if I wanted to keep anything at his house. He cleaned out a dresser drawer in his closet and shared it with me. I never asked for more than that. Even when he asked me to move in. There was a closet across the house with a few odds and ends in it and I easily added my clothes to that closet. Every other item has slowly been added to that closet as well. The leaf to the table, old picture frames, gift bags, art supplies, my 8 year old's sewing machine, every board game we own, along with all of my personal items...in this tiny space. My own tiny tightly compact space.



This afternoon as I stood there looking at this massively packed tiny walk in closet I realized that I was worth more than 1 drawer. I am worth more than a few square feet in a packed closet. I decided to gift my children's items back to them. At 7 and 8 they could put their items in their own space. As I was taking a box of sewing materials out, I caught one of my dresses and it swung back, hit the warm drying candle and it fell to the ground. The glass stayed intact while the wax splattered. My jeans and 1 sock are now permanently red.

I was extremely frustrated with myself. I had to see where this started from. When did I assume I could have no more space than this? When did I feel I wasn't worth anything more than this? I had to go back...back in time!

I went back to sharing drawers, 5 kids in 1 tiny bedroom, having to eliminate my things so others would feel included and have their own space. I gave up me to include them...I was ok with that until I lost me all together.

Now, I see that if I simply speak, take action and clean up this mess I can include them without giving up me.

These moments and realizations have been the most important stepping stones in my life. They help me reinvent my point of view.

Like Wayne Dyer said "Change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."